The Art of Delayed Gratification

In the halls of Stanford University, there have been many profound findings and unforgettable alums. With notable alumni including: Phil Knight, co-founder of Nike (Shoe Dog, great read 7.6/10), John F Kennedy, former President of the United States, John Steinbeck, author of The Grapes of Wrath (read this in high school, overrated 4.6/10), Reese Witherspoon (a true Elle Woods), and even, now topical, Elon Musk. In addition to these graduates, Stanford has conducted numerous significant research experiments over the past few decades.

In 1970, Walter Mischel at Stanford University conducted an experiment with conclusions that would ripple into the next millennium.

I present to you: The Marshmallow Experiment.

Sounds simple really. Sounds like one of those egg drop experiments we did in high school Physics class. Matter of fact, this was a very simple experiment. In this experiment, children (most kids were around 4 to 5 years old) were given a choice: they could eat one marshmallow immediately or wait 15 minutes and receive 2 marshmallows instead. As the happy-go-lucky, plump, oblivious 5 year old I used to be, I know I would’ve had a difficult time waiting for the second marshmallow. The premise of this was so that Mischel and his colleagues could see how many kids were able to restrain themselves to set aside their current desires for future promise. Update: around 30% of the kids were able to wait.

Now, I know as adults and young adults, we’re the ones typically teaching the children lessons through experience, but in this case, conclusions drawn from this experiment can be extrapolated across the board. Let me dive deeper. The kids who waited, down the line scored 210 points higher on the SAT on average, experienced higher levels of academic achievement, healthier BMI, and better coping skills when faced with stress.

Indicating that if you can delay gratification, rewards will be greater in the future.

In an age where everything is seemingly at our fingertips: news spreads like wildfire, any and every bit of information is accessible (whether truthful or deceptive), groceries can be delivered to our home, services are available on-demand, communication happens instantaneously, social media grants us a portal into everyone’s life, giving us a taste of everyone’s highlight reel comparing it to our B roll (more on this later, but remember comparison is the thief of Joy), it’s hard to tailor ourselves for delayed gratification. Why would we? Everything around us is moving at 100 miles a second, why would we ever pause and why would we ever delay gratification if I can access what’s right in front of me already?

You ever been in a really hot area? Where it seems like you’re hallucinating and you see an oasis of water but it’s just a….. mirage. Mirage is a lot of things. It’s a casino in Las Vegas. It’s a transformer in one of the new movies (properly rated, 2.7/10). The definition of Mirage is something that appears real but is not in fact so. The things on the edge of our fingertips are real in a sense, but they aren’t our life and they aren’t standard life. Instantaneously getting what I want and what I seek trains my brain for impatience. I think I should have abs in 10 minutes. I think I should be able to cook dinner in 10 minutes with no clean up. I think if I wake up at 6:30 and go to the gym one time I’ll be fit because that’s how it seems. In a 15 second video I see someone go from fat to jacked so I think it’s that easy.

It’s not. And when it takes longer than I think I beat myself up over it. I’m my harshest critic.

Technology is a blessing. It has made life incredibly efficient, but it trains us to think we can get what we want with little to no effort. That is not the case. Life is difficult. This shit is hard. But that’s the beauty of it. It’s my life, it’s your life, you can choose how you live it, you just have to understand everything you want, desire, dream of will not happen overnight. That is a myth. But it can happen if you stay committed to yourself, your dreams, and your conviction.

“Work hard and become a leader, be lazy and become a slave.” Proverbs 12:24

If you put in the effort consistently and work diligently, you will rise.

“Don’t give up what you want most, for what you want now.” — Richard Scott

What desires are you feeding today that are taking away from your future aspirations?

We’ll talk next week, cheers.